Off The Rails

On a gloomy Tuesday, Cooper called Lou. Lou set down his phone. He was stunned. He felt used. A ticking time-bomb he couldn’t defuse had been tossed at his feet, there was nothing to do but go home to his wife and tell her the news.

“That Cooper should have to walk a mile in your shoes!”

“I know you are shocked. I’m dumbfounded too.”

“What happens next month when the mortgage is due?”

Lou smiled at his wife and held out his hand, “We’ll figure it out, Dear. I love you.”

“Sure we will. I love you too, Lou.”

Credit where credit is due, this week’s Friday Fictioneer prompt was provided by C.E. Ayr. Many thanks to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for keeping the challenge running on time. Off The Rails seemed an apt title for my contribution this week. I assure you, every word counts. More FF stories are here. Thanks for reading.

21 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers – Off The Rails

  1. As we careen toward Friday, I do in fact feel like there’s a ticking time bomb… and I don’t know where to throw it. Love the rhyming, and play on words here, Steph. Wonderful!

  2. Hope the time bomb doesn’t go off. A lovely portrayal of a supportive relationship.

  3. And that’s just what you do!
    You’ve made a happy story out of a sad situation.
    Enjoyable read.

  4. A timebomb ticking… mortgages can be like that. Love that he could share it… maybe they can come up with something

  5. Sandra says:

    A trouble shared is a trouble halved. We should all have that kind of support. Good one, Honie.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Agreed. Thanks, Sandra.

  6. wmqcolby says:

    I like the way it rhymes. I kept waiting for The Cat in The Hat to enter. Like Papa Walton said to Mama Walton in The Homecoming, “Love, darlin’.”

    Nice to see you, “Homie” (intended misspelling). 😉

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      It is terrific that you picked up on the absurd Seussesqueness of this story as my life is a bit like a version of the Grinch Who Stole Christmas.

      1. wmqcolby says:

        I allow NO grinches to steal from me. Even if they DO sound like Boris Karloff. 😉

  7. rgayer55 says:

    The best thing he can do is get away from the time bomb, or throw it back at Cooper.
    I was surprised at how quickly his wife changed her tune (he must be quite a charmer). When I lost my job in the 80’s Connie was upset for quite some time.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      I suppose an alternate ending would go something like, “No we won’t. I’m leaving, we’re through,” but I couldn’t do that to Lou. Fictional characters are too fragile for that kind of shock. Lou might have went on a rampage and ended up in prison or on reality tv.

  8. Dear StepHonie,

    I can’t imagine what that ticking time bomb might be. At least he has the love of his life beside him. Well written.



    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Dear Rochelle,

      That’s the way that they say it goes in fairy tales.

      Regards from the crazy train,

      1. I have my own purple boxcar on that train.

  9. Lil Fafa says:

    I’ll have a cocoa with you.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      You rhyme schemer! Make mine a double.

  10. Michael Wynn says:

    Great piece. What happens next, presumably the time bomb is still ticking

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Tic, tic, ticking. Always. What happens next is anybody’s guess.

  11. acflory says:

    Love this. The riches money can’t buy.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Someone has to be loyal, otherwise we’re all doomed.

      1. acflory says:

        On a good day I believe most people are loyal. Then on a bad day…

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