Honie Briggs

Seriously!

bjorn

Copyright Björn Rudberg

Julianna’s big sister had entertained her with bedtime stories for as long as she could remember.

“Is this going to be one of your ‘he sold his car to buy strings for her cello and she sold her cello to buy snow tires for his car’ stories?”

“My god, JuJu, how much do you think cello strings cost? No. Just listen. You haven’t heard this one; I promise,” Marie whispered. “Devon was a handsome cellist. He played here with a chamber orchestra before you were born.”

Marie closed her eyes, summoning her courage.

“Nine months to be exact.”

*****

Well, there you have it. My 100 word story prompted by the genius, the poet, Björn Rudberg. Rochelle Wisoff-Fields is the name of the dame who keeps Friday Fictioneers rockin’ and rollin’. Check out more FF stories here.

34 thoughts on “Once Upon A Mistake

  1. jwdwrites says:

    I seem to remember my older brother telling me I was some one else’s kid, but I think that was just because he resented sharing the bedroom. Good story Honie with a killer last line 👍

  2. Michael Wynn says:

    Great twist at the end. Does she say it loud enough to be heard, or is she confessing?

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      That is an interesting question. Suppose the reader should decide, what would you say?

  3. I totally “got” the sister relationship and was glad to read (in the comments) that I did. Good one Stephanie.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Thanks Dawn. It was a bit unclear, I think, if it was necessary to state it outright or let readers decided for themselves.

  4. Wow this story really packs a punch! A whole novel in 100 words

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      R.G. Nice to see your comment. Thank you.

  5. I was going to write a story about a man who sold his cello strings … but obviously didn’t. You fit it so nicely into yours. Kudos

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      I enjoyed the story you chose to tell, Alicia.

  6. Life Lessons of a Dog Lover says:

    I was smiling through all the funny stories until the heartfelt end. Nicely done, my mind is running with possibilities.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Good. That’s what a story is supposed to do.

  7. OOO love this! That killer last line… (quite curious about the one she thought was going to be read to her too!)

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Big sisters, I know because I am one, have lots of stories to tell. Sometimes really interesting ones.

  8. Ohhh, chills, Steph! Love this one. I had it all played out, as I read the first lines, and you totally blindsided me. Love this sweet story.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Wap Pow, Dawn. Thanks so much for your comment. I wasn’t sure if the “sister’s” relationship came through.

  9. wmqcolby says:

    Ohhhh … SNAP! I figured such. Sis is really Mom. makes me wonder what the family situation is. As Mister Spock would say, “Fascinating.”

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Funny you should mention Mr. Spock, whose brand of wit often finds its way into my family’s dinner conversation. We are big fans of Spock logic and the Vulcan pinch retort.

  10. Rowena says:

    I love you story and all the comments as well. For me, there needs to be some sense of the bizarre almost in a short story or flash but it still needs to be credible and you achieved both of those very well. My husband was a menopause baby and there was talk that his older sister was his mother around town. His Mum actually went to have a hysterectomy and was told to go home. She was pregnant. So, that was quite a story as well. He turns 50 this weekend.
    xx Rowena

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      That is a great personal connection to my little fiction. My husband’s grandmother discovered she had a sister when she was 72. Family secrets are of particular interest to me. They make for interesting reading and terrific drama. Thanks for your comment.

      1. Rowena says:

        How exciting. Do you know how it went? My husband’s father has a half sister born after his mother died but there’s been no contact and we don’t know what she knows. I have wondered whether we should try to make contact. If it was me, I’d want to know.

  11. rgayer55 says:

    My mother used to be a big fan of True Confessions magazine. She would have loved this one, especially after you add all steamy details.

    P.S. – That cellist should have worn a cover on his bow.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Good. I wasn’t sure if “big sister’s” situation was clear. I tinkered with a line about the difference in their age, but couldn’t make the word count work. Bow covers should be standard equipment for traveling cellists.

  12. Dear StepHonie,

    I don’t need to teach you anything about storytelling. That’s a bedtime story she’s not soon to forget. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Maybe they will live happily ever after some therapy.

  13. Sandra says:

    Bedtime confessional. No sleep after that, I should imagine. Nice one, Honie.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Thanks, Sandra. Headline in the morning paper reads: Sisters Share Sleepless Night After Secret Severs Sybling Storytime – Oh Mama!

  14. michael1148humphris says:

    Well its out in the open now.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      What do you suppose happens next?

  15. Yes, there is always a time to tell the story… not too much sleep after such a revelation.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      Not too much sleep for Marie on many nights I suspect. Thanks for the prompt!

  16. Iain Kelly says:

    Quite a revelation for a bedtime story! Excellent work.

    1. HonieBriggs says:

      It was bound to happen sooner or later. Thanks!

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