
Copyright – Janet Webb
In the safety of community, we find guidance, choices, hope. The way forward is not behind us. Children watch us, taking note as withered wisdom’s blossoms fade, fortunes lost, ransoms paid. Icy roadblocks freeze our tracks, keeping us ever looking back, wishing for a different way than living to fight another day.
Surrendered to the calendar life seems futile. Commanded to obey instinct we lose the game of pray for prey. Melted puddles underfoot, embers defying ash and soot, dreams won’t be held against their will. Flickers flash one last mad dash soaring, imploring better angels, “Save us from ourselves.”
*****
This week’s Friday Fictioneer prompt, courtesy of Janet Webb, inspired this poetic prose that pretty much sums up how I feel about current events. Final exams are next week and my brain has been working overtime. So, feel free to reel me back in from the deep end.
#ADSBELOWTHISPOSTARENOTENDORSEDBYTHISBLOGGER
Beautifully written.
well written, detailed and such organized!
The profound truth of this will linger.. Where would we be tied to ourselves?
Dear Stephonie,
(Nope, not a typo 😉 ) I can’t add to the comments above and I can never outdo Doug, so best not to try. So I’ll day ditto to his and other comments. At the same time I’m sending out the lifeline to pull you from the deep end. You can only tread water for just so long. Although I love to do flip turns in deep water. “Save us from ourselves.” Indeed. Beautiful writing as always. No wonder this is one of my favorite places.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Dear Rochelle,
Flip turns, I should practice those.
Rowing My Boat To Shore,
Stephanie
Beautifully written, Honie, and so powerful. Best of luck on your exams.
Exams! Yes, I may not have any brain power left after next week.
I loved it too, Honie. Just a comment–I think it would have been an easier read (for me) if you had broken the lines into poetry-style format. Beautiful message and very creative.
It started out that way, but then I decided to go with the prose instead. Too subtle? Not subtle enough? Sometimes the rhythm doesn’t work quite right when I mix the two.
Dear Honie,
I love the pacing and the prose that falls from your story like the drops of water from a melting icicle. You invoked the harsh winter and the thoughts that come while enduring it. You framed your story well, including the children watching and the observant eyes of the ancients (us) who are going through it. Musical (a dirge) and beautiful, your story was well written and a delight to read. Good job.
Aloha,
Doug
Dear Doug,
Your comment is quite poetic.
Delighted,
Honie
Dear Honie, Absolutely love this story. Mike and I went to see “Fiddler on the Roof” when it first came out in cinema. We loved it so much, we took Mike’s parents and went another time to the High School play. It was perfect! Just wonderful! Nan 🙂
It’s one of our faves around here.
It always amazes me the creativity and imagination that the Friday Fictioners come up with..the mad skills you have to look at this photo and come up with a well written/crafted story for it, sigh.
I wish I had time to get around to reading them all. Sadly, I have but one life to read. The prompts really do grab onto a story sometimes. This one certainly did.
I only read three or four. Youre always a good read
A great addition to my guidelines for life. And the children are watching!
You have guidelines? I’m just wingin’ it. 😉
Hi Honie. Love the lilt – a very poetic piece of writing with a strong message.
Hey Helen. Always nice to see your comments. I trust all is well with you. I think your blog is one that mysteriously fell off my feed. I’m back with ya now. Each time I get a comment from someone I haven’t seen a post from in a while, I discover the “follow” is unclicked. WP!
Hi Honie. I have had the same mysterious problem with WP.
O.K. this whole piece had gorgeous rhythm – this was my favorite combination of words – Flickers flash. Lovely all the way around.
Flickers flash. I liked that too.
Wonderful rhythm!
La la la… 😉 Thanks, Dawn.
You’ve done such a great job with 100 words here. I especially love your line, “the way forward is not behind us.” Nice!
Well, Mr. JohnMarkMiller, thank you very much. You did a great job yourself, and I really like how the photo prompt is displayed in the background of your story. That is a nice feature of whatever theme you are using.
Thanks! I just recently updated my theme, and that was the one thing that really drew me to this one…
Honie, this is amazing! Almost prayerful in its prose and style. Just wonderful writing! (Reading Allan’s comment above reminds me: do you prefer Stephanie or Honie? I think it each time I leave a comment!)
Hey Dawn. Thanks! My son and I watched Fiddler on the Roof during the Thanksgiving break, and I think “If I Were a Rich Man” must still be floating around in my head. Stephanie or Honie, either is fine with me. You’ve had a busy time lately, so, that you read my entry and paid me such a generous compliment means a lot to me. 🙂
This is my favorite time of the week! I love reading the other stories, and figuring out my own. It’s always awesome to read your work, Honie! That song is so meaningful… so much of the music from FOTR!
This is lovely. It really compliments the beautiful photo.
I wasn’t sure I’d be able to do Janet’s photo justice. I appreciate your kind compliment.
Indeed, great stuff. You even managed some mad rhymez in there. I’m impressed.
“The way forward is not behind us.” True…unless you prescribe to the adage, ‘those who do not learn from the past are doomed to repeat it.’ But I’m probably just overthinking too much.
Thanks, Mr. Petruska. Not a bunch of learners from the past, us humans. A good reason to move on from it, don’t ya think?
I can’t argue with that point!
This is really well-written, Stephanie. It is a great reminder for us that in this season of giving, often times the best gift can be the example of how we are living.
Life inspired by friends like you is the best gift ever. Thanks Allan.