Hold on to your metadata people, there’s a new sheriff in town! That’s right; Facebook is now the frontline for my favorite kind of vigilantes. Fear mongers masquerading as crusaders for law and order. Yes, Facebook will root out the evil doers and save the world from itself. Oh, victory in Facebook! Praise be to Facebook!
Hallelujah, thine the glory. Great things Facebook hath done.
Of course, illegal gun sales are bad. Absolutely, criminal activity should be foiled. Without a doubt, there is nothing worse than creeps and freaks getting away with conducting their dirty business right under our noses. But wait, there’s more….
What happens when someone’s good name, say, Bob Gunn, ninth generation of the Smithfield Gunns, who loves his wife and children, is mistaken for, say, Buy Gun @ Smith and Wesson GunRunnersRUs, who loves to load his trunk with next generation fire power?
Yeah, what happens to Bob’s family when the deacons of First Self-Righteous Assembly of Better-n-You show up in front of Bob’s house and demand Bob confess to a crime he didn’t commit? What happens to Bob’s children when they are ostracized on the playground at school or Bob’s wife when she’s kicked out of the Snobby Little Sandwich Luncheon Society? Will someone issue a Facebook apology to the Gunn family?
What sort of contingency planning has gone into this new world order of Facebook as judge and jury? Will Facebook bring all criminals to justice? Sex traders, drug mules, pet owners who don’t scoop the poop? Well? What say ye, Facebook? What kind of surveillance will there be for spam scammers, hackers, and identity thieves who already peddle their wares via Facebook? Will Facebook hire secret agents, bounty hunters? What kind of compensation will these mercenaries of social media receive?
Good for you Facebook for figuring out how to track the criminal activities of people willing to give you their information for free. Way to go! Brilliant! Now all you have to do is get tax payers to bankroll this grand illusion. It’s a new dawn. It’s a new day! I feel safer already.
Fine Print: I will NOT host a hateful discussion on this blog about rights, fears, angry things people want to say about people who own guns, or stupid things people want to say about people who don’t own guns. By all means, feel free to speak your mind. Be careful not to go shootin’ your mouth off. My personal experience with gun violence, gun phobias, rubber band guns, potato guns, marshmallow guns, BB guns, shotgun weddings, or any other gun related topic is irrelevant. So, don’t ask.
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