The appeal of having servants isn’t lost on me. No, I would certainly appreciate someone else attending to, say, every single household chore ever invented. Putting our house on the market has sharpened my awareness of how much I dislike domesticity, but we have to live somewhere and we can’t very well live in squalor, now can we?
Strangers traipsing around scrutinizing the tidiness of my closets, the shade of green on the walls of the powder room, well, it is a bit intrusive. But for them to envision themselves living in 2100 square feet of energy efficient suburban bliss, an open house is what’s required. I wish we could slap a virtual tour on Realtor.com with a message that says…
You Want To Live Here. You Know You Do. So, buy it. BUY IT NOW.
Of course we did that too, but for some reason people like to visit a place, stand around in its open floor plan, feel the coolness of its granite counter tops, and see their reflection in a sparkling glass shower enclosure before they sign on the dotted line. I get it. But to stand there and ask things they could have easily discovered online, like the house has two stories, or that the bedrooms are all upstairs, or that there is no pool?
Come on! Give me a break! I did some serious cleaning for you people! Make me an offer or complement my decorating sense or at least ask how I remove soap scum!
According to savvy real estate agents, Feng Shui is the way to get a house sold quickly. So, I did just what they said, played non-offensive music lightly in the background, placed the color red by the front door, folded all the bath towels in the same direction instead of cramming them on the shelves. At the end of the day we only had four visitors to our open house. Hardly worth the FENG shui. Plus all the dusting, vacuuming, and hiding the dirty laundry in the trunk of my car.
So, we wait. Keep the candy dish filled and fresh flowers by the door. Oh, and replace the stage fruit when it begins to shrivel. Gotta head to class now and get my road rage on.
See ya ‘round the bend. As always, ads below this post are NOT endorsed by this blogger.