Gilded by Academia art students, this replica of Michelangelo’s David was too fun not to share.

Okay so, I returned this morning from a romantic vacation with my wonderful husband to celebrate our twenty years of wedded bliss. If you thought I was going to share photos of picture postcard scenery and write about the amazing food, charming people and exceptional service we experienced, well, I will, but first you must know this: I am sick. Terribly sick. So sick in fact that when we finally arrived home, a day later than expected, I took a hot shower, ate a grilled cheese sandwich, tomato soup, some Benadryl and Motrin, did a couple of shots of Emergen-C, slathered myself with Vicks Vapor Rub, put on my favorite “don’t touch me” plaid pajamas and crawled into bed.

Today, I have kankles, my head might explode and I need a pedicure!

Then I had a dream. A marvelous, wacky dream in which Ellen DeGeneres and I were painting each others toe nails and talking about, what else, handbags and shoes!

I know wacky, right? But there she was, showing me some incredible knock-offs she picked up in Milan and I was telling E, that’s what she likes me to call her, that I believe a covert communicable disease attack was perpetrated while we were in route home from Italy. It could have just been the Benadryl talking.

“I mean really E, if you had to fly commercial these days, you’d have to place your personal belongings into plastic tubs that have held millions of shoes that walked through men’s rooms and parking lots. Sick!”

“You’re right Honie, that is sick, but don’t you just love this Cover Girl Continuous Color nail polish?”

I awoke suddenly and thought, OMG! I better get downstairs and write this down before I forget it! There you have it, my first remembrances of the final moments of our fantastic trip to Italy. It gets better, I promise. It plays out more like Eat, Pray, Eat Some More and hope you don’t split your pants! There is a Planes, Trains and Automobiles….oh and VESPAS segment. Plus a tour of the “red light district” of Pompeii (I’m not even kidding) you won’t want to miss. As most vacations go, there were many thrilling moments. I will share only the highlights. It will be difficult to choose since there are so many. Overall it was a trip of a lifetime to be remembered with laughter and love.

This is the stuff of dreams!

27 thoughts on “My BiG Fat Italian Anniversary

  1. OMG! I have those same pajamas!

    1. Honie Briggs says:

      They are fashionable, aren’t they? HA! 🙂

  2. Happy 20th, and here’s to many many more years of health and happiness to you both. Sorry you’re not feeling well, but I did enjoy seeing your PJs and hearing about your dream with E. I bet she’d be a cool person to hang with, in dreams or real life. And I’m impressed that in your dream, even with all those shoes, she remembered to do a promo plug.

    1. Honie Briggs says:

      Thank you Madame for the kind wishes. Yeah, I know, that promo thing, wacky right? I think my sub-conscience knew I was about to go into a fevered TSA rant and quickly changed the subject back to my need for a pedicure. Once I dreamed that E was showing off some chandelier earrings. I couldn’t bring myself to tell her they were hideous. So, I challenged her to a dance off instead.
      Wacky! 😉

  3. Michele says:

    I’m glad you’re home safe, but that stinks that you’re sick 😦

    1. Honie Briggs says:

      Yes, SAFE thanks to the vigilance that protects us from destructive health and beauty products and SICK because of stupid-ass arbitrary rules!
      Oh, 🙂

  4. Brigitte says:

    Yowsa woman, you know how to begin a blog, especially with that first pic. ;). I’m sooooo sorry you’re feeling sickly (was there a few weeks ago myself) but I can see you still have your sense of humor. Nice pj’s btw. Snuggle in, get well and we’ll be waiting to hear all about your wonderful trip. The pic of you and your hubby is magnificent. xxoo

    1. Honie Briggs says:

      Yowsa is right! It was so funny to see this dude there in the courtyard at the end of our tour. Of course, no photos are allowed inside, so I took the opportunity as soon as we exited. Michelangelo’s David, originally located in the Piazza della Repubblica, was exposed to the elements and over time the gold wore off. The students had a great idea to create this kitschy thing and place it right outside.
      The story of how the actual David was carved from a piece of discarded marble is fascinating.

      1. Brigitte says:

        THANK YOU FOR THE POSTCARD!!! I just got it today. Hope you’re feeling better, Honie. ;).

        1. Honie Briggs says:

          Prego! Hey that’s great! The postal system still works. Slowly making my way back to human form 🙂 GAAAHH!

  5. swlothian says:

    G’day Honie,
    I was thrilled for you when I found out you were racing around Italy.
    It an awesome place and I’m sure your memories will last a lifetime.
    ….yeah…. Pompeii….. there are some interesting surprises there!!

    1. Honie Briggs says:

      G’day! 🙂 You’re so funny! Everywhere we went was interesting, surprising, glorious and thrilling. Memories, yes.

  6. I just Love David, and am thinking of tarting up my little bust of him.

    1. Honie Briggs says:

      Go ahead, tart that bad boy up!

    1. Honie Briggs says:

      🙂 You can speak Americana now.

      1. Wyrd Smythe says:

        Muchas danke, mon ami!

        Heck, I can speak Fargo, ya know. Yeah, you betcha!

        1. Honie Briggs says:

          Yup, sounds kinda like my swangy spanglish! Throw a little Thai/Swedish in the mix & I’m freakin ridiculous.

  7. Sounds like a great trip. Sorry to hear about the vacation ‘hangover’. Hope you feel better soon and glad you’re back. Missed reading your posts!

    1. Honie Briggs says:

      It was a great trip. Thanks! If I don’t drop dead or cough up a lung, there will be posts a plenty!

      1. By the way, those pajamas are classic. I’ve migrated from flannel to wearing yoga clothes to bed. I never do yoga in them, but all the stretchy, clingy fabric makes me look like an overstuffed sausage, so there’s that.

        1. Honie Briggs says:

          LOL! Love it.

  8. leemajors says:

    Belated Happy Anniversary ! Here’s wishing you many many more years to come… and thanks for sharing your trip to Italia 🙂

    1. Honie Briggs says:

      Grazie! I’ll be speaking Italian like that for a while. 🙂

      1. leemajors says:

        Oh I know how its like 🙂 I came from France early this year and until now I have their aczent ! 🙂 Best regards from the Philippines

  9. artsifrtsy says:

    Benadryl doesn’t give me quite the creative rush it does you. I never see Ellen and things are mostly blurry:) Glad to see your wit is still intact – get well soon!

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