Match Made On Eleven

copyright - Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

copyright – Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

Sarah wasn’t a morning person.  She often overslept and had to dash straight into the elevator with her hair still wet.

“Surely for this,” she said, “He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me not.”

It was something silly she learned as a girl, but she whispered and wished as she passed each floor, always arriving in the lobby on “He loves me not.”

One morning, Sarah accidentally pressed “up.” All the way down, she recited the incantation. The door opened.

“He loves me,” she sighed, and there stood the man of her dreams.

Or so she thought.

*****

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36 Responses to Match Made On Eleven

  1. pattisj says:

    Or so she thought–oh, dear. Sounds like she’s in for t-r-o-u-b-l-e.

  2. atrm61 says:

    Loved the almost “happy ending” to this ;-)

  3. Nan Falkner says:

    I love your story and He Loves Me, he loves me not! Great story! Nan :)

  4. HaHa, I love Mac Davis (is he still alive?)

  5. Oh dear. A dream gone bad. Well done.

  6. Way to keep your reader guessing, Honie. I read the ending two different ways — first, sinister — there’s something dangerous about this man. The second — that he’s disappointing — certainly not the man of her dreams.

  7. wmqcolby says:

    As Hawkeye Pierce said on MASH (somewhat) quoting Kipling, “If you can keep your head while those about you are losing theirs, then you probably haven’t checked with your answering service.”

    … and i have a feeling she didn’t. Honie, you did GREAT!

  8. Amy Reese says:

    Now that is an interesting matchmaking idea! Ha ha. I so want her to find the man of her dreams. A magic elevator. I want one of those. I guess anything magic would work .Great story, Honie!

  9. Indeed.. destroy all the happy ends… and at the end her broken body was found at the bottom of the elevator shaft.

  10. Dang! I want to believe too. Must you twist us around at the end? I love the idea of her saying “he loves me, he loves me not,” all the way down each day… it’s something I did when I was young. Well done Honie!

  11. Havin a big old heartbreak on the mind is a good ime to write a story.

  12. Cute incantation, strange the things that follow us from childhood.

  13. It seems like a happy ending, but that last line leaves a doubt. Anyway, well-written. Let’s hope for the best. I enjoyed the song. :)

    • Honie Briggs says:

      The song, I know, telling right? I love Mac Davis. Can you believe he sang that song with the Muppets and they actually sang the lyric “hell of a man?” Funny coincidence, Mac’s second wife was named Sarah.

  14. Harliqueen says:

    Brilliant short piece, I love the twist at the ending, really great!

  15. RajlakshmI says:

    Loved the ending. Too bad for Sarah

  16. enjoyed the twist and hope he is indeed.

  17. Horus says:

    Sweet positive end.. :)

  18. Shandra says:

    Great twist…or so she thought…we always think he’ll be the man of our dreams. Wondering now.

  19. The FF zap at the end! I wonder whether she did the same with flower petals.

    janet

  20. Dear Honie,

    This reads like the prologue or intro to something bigger. I loved the rhythm of “he loves me…he loves me not…”

    Nice one.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  21. JudahFirst says:

    Oh, good job! I was thinking this was a nice love story … until the zinger at the end!

  22. Darn….I wish I had an elevator!!

  23. misskzebra says:

    The “He loves me. He loves me not” test has also failed me on several occasions…

  24. good wee twist at the end :)

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